Is Santa Real?
In this article we will be going over whether or not Santa Claus is real.
Many people seem to have many opinions on whether or not Santa is real however most of them are incorrect. Most of the population believes Santa is fake in fact according to CNN's statistics 85% of 4 year old's still believe,however only 25% of 6 year old's still believe. Santa was born in 1669 to a mother of 14 children called Staci Claus After many years of the same yearly vacation to the present factory Santa saw a toy that caught his eye it was a small glass jar filled with liquid . He got curious and drank the liquid after he left the factory with his family he found out he couldn't age. Santa thought this was amazing so he robbed a bank and gave the money to the toy making company. After doing this he decided since he cannot die he will kidnap some elves from Siberia. Santa made off on his journey it took 19 hours,but he didn't give up.Santa soon reached a small town in Siberia where the people there had a weird growing disorder.So Santa had always been insecure about his height so he got small people to make him feel taller.
After Santa collected his elves he hiked into the mountains to find some sort of animal to pull his train. He eventually decided he would use reindeer to pull a sleigh not a train. Santa realized he would need somewhere safe to hide if he didn't get the people what they wanted. So he hid at the north pole which later became his work town. Santa was mad at the elves because they kept whining. "Santa" they said "why must you not pay us or feed us"." Or lock us in the dungeon to make toys for you. We just want to go back to Siberia". They thought they were getting through to Santa but he stayed strong. He said "If you ask me to feed you one more time i will feed you sugar until you get diabetes. So that's what he did he fed them gallons of sugar every hour on the hour. Although Santa knew this was a long and difficult procedure the elves deserved it. Seeing all that sugar Santa thought to himself one gallon of sugar won't hurt anyone. So he engulfed the sugar until it was to late. His sweet tooth kicked in and he couldn't help himself he ate all the sugar in sight. That's how he became such a large size.
By now the year had changed drastically it was not 1739 Santa's mother was in the hospital with Alzheimer's he went to go see her,but he had changed in size. ( The photo to the left is of Santa in his best shape,size ) He walked in and saw his mother she saw him and yelled. "AGghahg%$#@*" "What is that hideous beast". Santa walked up to her and started to sob softly because even his own mother didn't recognize him. he slowly placed his hand on her arm she yelled even louder "AGhaghhhaghgah%$#@#%@$#%#$#$". He quietly told her Mom it's me. She stared at him for a moment then gasped. 'Oh you're the guy who owns the Walmart down the street". Santa cried on the walk home. When he got home he sat down and asked" why doesn't anyone love me". All of a sudden a fat woman strode through the door. Santa saw her and gasped he said " How did you escape". He wanted to yell at her but couldn't because of her immense beauty. Santa later married the escaped elf and they started a legacy.
In conclusion Santa is real and if you don't believe in him you will get coal in your lungs and get lung cancer.